In my previous post, I talked about the difficulties that mothers faced in balancing work and parenting. I also mentioned that the root cause of this issue of declining fertility rates is about the value systems of the individual and the family. In this sequel, I just wanted to share more about my personal experiences in balancing motherhood and work.
I remembered I used to laugh at one of my Junior College friend when she said God has called her to be a homemaker. I felt that it was a total waste of her university education but she said it would not go down the drain. She could use what she had learnt to pass on to her children in future. At that time, young as I was, I certainly did not think too much about parenting. I don't remember that I wanted to have children back then. I just graduated and the world was my oyster.
After I gave birth to Joshua, I took maternity and no-pay leave for a year to take care of him. When I went back to work, I always felt there was a struggle. I liked my job and the interaction with colleagues but sometimes the work stress got into me and I allowed myself to be affected. At times I felt like I was physically with my son but my mind was miles away. Even going on part-time employment did not help much because the responsibility and the work stress was still there.
It came to a point I really missed those times I could stay home and take care of Joshua. Afterall, they are small only once and if I missed his growing up years, there would be no turning back. For me and my hubby, having children is not just a natural progression after marriage or because other couples are having children. From the scriptures, we see that it is God's will for us to be fruitful and multiply. We also know that it is His desire for us to have godly offsprings. And so, we felt that the mother is in the best position to bring the child up in the ways of the Lord.
It never crossed my mind to be a full-time mum but slowly my desire to be a stay-home mum grew each day... I found out that God has called me to be a happy mother of children at home in the next season of my life. I don't know how long this home-staying season would be but I certainly know that staying on in the workforce would be a constant struggle for me. And so I prayed for God to speak to my hubby to be supportive and for the correct timing to resign.
It was certainly not an easy decision because it would mean that our household income is halved. But I know that when God calls, He will provide. In fact, He provided exceedingly and abundantly through the form of additional income from our flat rental, just in time before He prompted me to resign. He also took care of my parents, who were initially against the idea of me staying home to look after Joshua. Afterall they found it a waste for me to stay home after completing a university education. I assured them that it was only for a season but I could not say when I would be going back to work...
And so, it has been more than 1.5 years that I have been a happy mother at home. I must say that it is the most fulfilling time of my life. Even so, sometimes I have to deal with my parents and relatives asking me 'Don't you think it is a waste for you not to work?' My hubby was sharing with his colleagues the other day that he is very appreciative of the fact that I am staying home to take care of Joshua. He felt that it was a sacrifice on my part because I could definitely make a mark for myself in the corporate world. He told his colleagues he would not take me for granted.
I really thank God that my hubby appreciates me for staying home. But really, I do not feel it is a sacrifice at all. I felt it is a privilege to not work and stay home to take care of my children. I know of some mothers who envy those who could stay home. Of course, from the economic perspective, it is certainly not productive for graduate mothers like me to stay home and not contribute to the economy. But if one confines the contribution to full-time employment, then the definition would be too narrow. This period of staying home has been a turning point in my life. I would never have written and published my book if I was still holding a full-time job. I would never have realised my dream of being an author.
So you see, staying home opens up other employment opportunities for mothers. I know some have started their on-line businesses or done freelancing work or turned to writing like me. But this would not have happened if I had not taken the step to quit full-time work to stay home. People may think that once you stay home, that is the end of your career. Well, not for me...it is the beginning of another wonderful vocation that God has planned for me!
No comments:
Post a Comment