As I ministered to some sisters recently, I saw how they were holding on to their issue so tightly they could hardly breathe. That issue had become the point of obsession in their lives even though it was clearly not a life or death matter. Their problem became so big that it was all they could think of and all they could talk about.
I know how it feels because I have been there before. It is so painful and when you are trapped in that cycle of disappointment, pity and depression, it is no fun at all. You feel so helpless and angry at yourself for not being able to walk out of that mountain. You are sick and tired of being sick and tired. You hope things would change but you don't see any change happening, at least not on the surface. You are frustrated because you don't see any progress...that every time you thought you turned the corner, the next moment you find yourself at the same old place! It's a terrible feeling.
The more we dwell on it, the bigger it becomes until it turns disproportionate. Very soon you will be so disappointed and bitter that you find it harder to latch on to hope, settling for a less than fulfilled life, lest the disappointment overwhelm you one more time. You will find that in spite of God's repeated assurances and His word that your time has come, you have more 'faith' in the distance between you and your desires than you do in God's supernatural ability to fulfill them.
You will start to shun God's people because you fear condemnation and you feel lousy because after so many years, you still have not seen your breakthroughs. You even blame God for allowing such things to happen to you. You start to wonder why these struggles don't happen to other people except you. Why the rest have it easy when you kept struggling over your challenges? Now most of the times we don't know the challenges of others because they don't share with us. Even if it doesn't happen in the same manner to them, they also have their own struggles albeit in a different area. Everyone of us have our challenges but only in Christ can we overcome them.
Well, I have my own challenge. It's in the area of childbearing but I know the time has come for Him to cause me to overcome this. I have also asked God why other ladies seem to have no problem conceiving except me. But I came to a point I realized complaining and murmuring is not going to help me. God has already declared that a shift has occurred and what used to be a struggle is not a struggle anymore. Like Paul and Silas, I choose to worship and praise Him in the midst of my challenges, instead of complaining. When all hope seemed lost, I will still praise Him because He is a good God. Instead of looking at my chains and prison doors, I look to the One who is not bound by prison doors. I believe God is going to suddenly cause the breakthrough and open doors to happen as I sing and praise His name.
No wonder God does not want us to say that the longing of our heart is far off, because the time of our deepest desire has now come. He wants our hopes to be renewed and believe once again that the season of fulfillment is upon us. God beckons us to take it one more time than we think we have strength for. I also realized that there are always two sides to a coin. I can choose to see the positive and give thanks to God for it or I can choose to see the negative side of our 'lack'. God opened my eyes to see how much I have progressed and the marvelous works He has done in my life, compared to the seeming lack I have.
No wonder God says in everything give thanks to Him. A thanksgiving heart is a receiving heart. And the devil doesn't want us to be grateful to God. He knows how powerful thanksgiving, praise and worship is. He knows that when we shift our focus from ourselves to Jesus, something powerful happens to our spirit. Our faith rises up and as we continue to see Him perform breakthrough after breakthroughs, our faith is reinforced and it is an upward cycle.
Besides, God has taught me to guard my thoughts and my heart. Do not let my heart be troubled and let not the devil steal my peace, my rest, my joy and my song. Precisely because I hold it too tightly, the devil can keep pushing this button. The Lord told me 'Don't let him do it anymore, it is actually very simple. Just be nonchalant about it, let go of any cares to me. Have a bo-chap attitude and hold things lightly.' Be ever ready to praise God for big and small things and be expectant of the good things He has in store. Blessings are really hunting us down because it is open heavens and God is raining over us right now.
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