We have stepped into the Star and into the year 2013. As Pastor Prince shared in the first service of the year, the theme for this year is 'The Key of David'. It is a year when God opens doors that no one can shut. Pastor Prince was saying two Sundays ago that some of the church members had already experienced the open doors in their lives. My first thought was 'So fast!'. God is so good to them.
Well, little did I know that God was orchestrating things behind the scenes to open this door for me. Ever since our church started worshipping at the Star on 23 Dec 2012, I have been thinking about the Star. I fell in love with the Star, this place where I call home. However, as my Sunday serving in Prayer and Healing Room is based at Marina Bay Sands (our church's satellite venue), I was not able to attend the Star regularly. I know that the church said they will look into rotating leaders so they can have a chance to serve at the Star, but in my heart, I thought...maybe not so soon.
My heart's desire and one of my three wishes this year is to be able to serve in a greater capacity at the Star. Although I did not request to be rotated to serve at the Star, secretly my prayer was if God wills, He will open a door of opportunity for me. Meanwhile, I will just be faithful to where He calls me, whether it is at Marina Bay Sands or the Star. I really did not expect God to open this door so soon. I received good news that the church is considering to move me to the Star, starting from February. My heart leapt! So fast? I am so thankful to the Lord for making this wish come true for me so soon. God is so good to me!
I am really excited about being able to attend services at the Star. All satellite locations are flowing with God's anointing when Pastor Prince preaches but there is something about being able to see the worship team and Pastor Prince 'live' on the stage. Well, all I can say is the place makes my spirit jump with joy and excitement each time I stepped into it. I don't know why...maybe my calling has got to do with that place. It is really like my Promised Land! Anyhow, I am very sure God is lovingly directing my steps and indeed He makes all things beautiful in its time! Praise Jesus!
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
'I don't understand it' file
I read a devotional from Pastor Joel recently. The title of the message is 'File It". He said that when things happen in your life that you don’t plan, do you find yourself trying to reason it all out or look for a “file” so to speak in your mind to put it in? What happens when you can’t reason it out or make sense of it all?
He offered the answer: Every one of us needs to create a file in our thinking called the “I Don’t Understand It” file. When things come up that don’t make sense, things that we can’t figure out, instead of getting frustrated or confused, put it in your “I Don’t Understand It” file and leave it alone. If we go through life trying to figure out why something bad happened or why things didn’t work out, it will cause us to become bitter and stuck in life. Part of trusting God means trusting Him when things don’t make sense because we know that His plan is always for good. We have to know that He will reveal all things in His time — even if that means in eternity.
There were certain things that happened that did not make sense in 2012 that I know I need to file away. I told the Lord: I choose today to file all these questions and disappointments away in the 'I don't understand it' file. I surrender all my past disappointments to You and still decide to trust You. Without You I am nothing. Who am I to even question Your plan and Your purposes? Yet in Your lovingkindness, You always reveals things to me to satisfy me. Thank God I have come to a place of peace and rest where all these things don't matter anymore. Why should I put my focus on things in the past when I know I cannot go back to change things? Why should I let all these unhappy things hold me back from the glorious future God has prepared in 2013?
Besides, the Lord asked me whether it makes any sense for Him to send His only begotten Son, the darling of heaven to come and die for us. Whatever Jesus had suffered before and on the cross - did it make any sense? Well, at the moment of His death, it totally did not make any sense to the disciples and for those who believed He is the Messiah. But after three days, when He resurrected from the grave and on Pentecost, after the Holy Spirit descended on the believers, it totally made sense. He had thoroughly defeated the devil and wrought victory for us all! God told me it made sense only when one could see His heart of love for us. It made sense only when we saw things in retrospect or on hindsight. Only God is the timeless One and He has the advantage of seeing things from the beginning to the end. And in the light of His great love for us, all these senseless things seemed so insignificant...there is no need to even ask 'Why, God? Why?' anymore.
Lord, I don't care why all that happened and it doesn't matter that things don't happen the way I hoped. Anyway it is not about me. It's all about Jesus. I let it all go. Today I surrender my past. I surrender my need to have all the answers and I choose to trust You. If You had wanted me to know, You would have shown it to me. But if You chose to hide from me, it must be because it is no longer important or that it is not beneficial for me. Or maybe the time was not right yet to reveal the answers to me. I don't need to put the focus on the enemy's plan and why he seemed to have succeeded...he loves attention but I am not going to give him any. I choose to give my attention to Jesus, the altogether lovely One. Only Jesus deserves all the praise and glory! And I know Jesus has already given me victory. The evil one cannot win. He is a defeated foe!
He offered the answer: Every one of us needs to create a file in our thinking called the “I Don’t Understand It” file. When things come up that don’t make sense, things that we can’t figure out, instead of getting frustrated or confused, put it in your “I Don’t Understand It” file and leave it alone. If we go through life trying to figure out why something bad happened or why things didn’t work out, it will cause us to become bitter and stuck in life. Part of trusting God means trusting Him when things don’t make sense because we know that His plan is always for good. We have to know that He will reveal all things in His time — even if that means in eternity.
There were certain things that happened that did not make sense in 2012 that I know I need to file away. I told the Lord: I choose today to file all these questions and disappointments away in the 'I don't understand it' file. I surrender all my past disappointments to You and still decide to trust You. Without You I am nothing. Who am I to even question Your plan and Your purposes? Yet in Your lovingkindness, You always reveals things to me to satisfy me. Thank God I have come to a place of peace and rest where all these things don't matter anymore. Why should I put my focus on things in the past when I know I cannot go back to change things? Why should I let all these unhappy things hold me back from the glorious future God has prepared in 2013?
Besides, the Lord asked me whether it makes any sense for Him to send His only begotten Son, the darling of heaven to come and die for us. Whatever Jesus had suffered before and on the cross - did it make any sense? Well, at the moment of His death, it totally did not make any sense to the disciples and for those who believed He is the Messiah. But after three days, when He resurrected from the grave and on Pentecost, after the Holy Spirit descended on the believers, it totally made sense. He had thoroughly defeated the devil and wrought victory for us all! God told me it made sense only when one could see His heart of love for us. It made sense only when we saw things in retrospect or on hindsight. Only God is the timeless One and He has the advantage of seeing things from the beginning to the end. And in the light of His great love for us, all these senseless things seemed so insignificant...there is no need to even ask 'Why, God? Why?' anymore.
Lord, I don't care why all that happened and it doesn't matter that things don't happen the way I hoped. Anyway it is not about me. It's all about Jesus. I let it all go. Today I surrender my past. I surrender my need to have all the answers and I choose to trust You. If You had wanted me to know, You would have shown it to me. But if You chose to hide from me, it must be because it is no longer important or that it is not beneficial for me. Or maybe the time was not right yet to reveal the answers to me. I don't need to put the focus on the enemy's plan and why he seemed to have succeeded...he loves attention but I am not going to give him any. I choose to give my attention to Jesus, the altogether lovely One. Only Jesus deserves all the praise and glory! And I know Jesus has already given me victory. The evil one cannot win. He is a defeated foe!
Stress is a killer
The best way to know if you are stressed is to ask yourself: Is my heart troubled? I believe the number one killer in the modern world is stress. It is a slow but sure killer. The physical root cause of many medical problems today is stress. Stress can cause you to age prematurely, give you rashes, cause gastric pains and lead to abnormal growths in your body. Many symptoms are brought about by psychological problems like stress. Stress is not from God. Peace is from God. In John 14:27, Jesus says 'Peace I give to you, My peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Let not your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.'
Even though I am a stay-home mum, I am not spared the stresses of life. I have experienced certain events (whether positive or negative) that caused me to be stressed. Recently the stress point was over Joshua's primary school adjustment. It was a major transition for me and our family. Every morning, I had to think of what healthy breakfast to cook for him, prepare him for school and check if he has homework. My schedule of quiet time with the Lord changed to be in the afternoons when he is in school. Thank God that the orientation was over but after that I fell sick. It was so bad that I had to take antibiotics but thank God I was still able to function in my daily chores.
Through all my stressful experiences, I was hoping to find a solution to stress. I found journaling very useful because I could record my feelings, my stress points and take it to the Lord in prayer. In writing down all these, I sometimes find the Lord encouraging me through a different perspective or causing me to see things clearly. Then I could also list down my thanksgivings and praise God for the marvelous things He has done far outweighs the negative things in my life. Writing down what God said to me also serves as a record or witness of the vision that will surely come to pass. When the evil one taunts me, I can refer to what God has said and rebuke him. But after a while I learnt that ignoring him is the best tactic. Why focus on him when I can focus on my Jesus! The altogether lovely One! The One who saves me and delivers me from my troubles!
Another thing that helps to reduce stress is by focusing on the good things. Philippians 4:8 says 'Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is virtuous, whatever is praiseworthy, meditate on such things.' For me, I found that what made me happy and joyful is to focus on the blessings, the wonderful things God has done for me. I find that if I could only focus on running my own race and not compare myself with others, I could live my life a whole lot better. Yes, I cannot control the things that happened around me but I can control my response towards them. I could focus on living to the fullest the life God gave me: spending time with God, doing things for my son, enjoying my meals, shopping for nice clothes, blogging, ministry work, enjoying family times during weekends etc.
Even though I am a stay-home mum, I am not spared the stresses of life. I have experienced certain events (whether positive or negative) that caused me to be stressed. Recently the stress point was over Joshua's primary school adjustment. It was a major transition for me and our family. Every morning, I had to think of what healthy breakfast to cook for him, prepare him for school and check if he has homework. My schedule of quiet time with the Lord changed to be in the afternoons when he is in school. Thank God that the orientation was over but after that I fell sick. It was so bad that I had to take antibiotics but thank God I was still able to function in my daily chores.
Through all my stressful experiences, I was hoping to find a solution to stress. I found journaling very useful because I could record my feelings, my stress points and take it to the Lord in prayer. In writing down all these, I sometimes find the Lord encouraging me through a different perspective or causing me to see things clearly. Then I could also list down my thanksgivings and praise God for the marvelous things He has done far outweighs the negative things in my life. Writing down what God said to me also serves as a record or witness of the vision that will surely come to pass. When the evil one taunts me, I can refer to what God has said and rebuke him. But after a while I learnt that ignoring him is the best tactic. Why focus on him when I can focus on my Jesus! The altogether lovely One! The One who saves me and delivers me from my troubles!
Another thing that helps to reduce stress is by focusing on the good things. Philippians 4:8 says 'Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is virtuous, whatever is praiseworthy, meditate on such things.' For me, I found that what made me happy and joyful is to focus on the blessings, the wonderful things God has done for me. I find that if I could only focus on running my own race and not compare myself with others, I could live my life a whole lot better. Yes, I cannot control the things that happened around me but I can control my response towards them. I could focus on living to the fullest the life God gave me: spending time with God, doing things for my son, enjoying my meals, shopping for nice clothes, blogging, ministry work, enjoying family times during weekends etc.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Rejoicing is a decision
There were many things happening in the past few months and though I was excited and thankful, I also experienced certain things that caused me to be discouraged. At the end of 2012, like some of you, there was also an unfulfilled wish in my life. When I heard a testimony of how the Lord came through for this sister in fulfilling two of her wishes on 27 Dec, I had mixed feelings. It was contradictory because while I thank God for His faithfulness, I was also wondering why the Lord has not come through for me in the eleventh hour, like He did for this sister. But the Lord has already done so many marvelous things for me this year. He answered my wishes that were not yet fulfilled in previous years.
Well, I have a choice. I can continue to wallow in the question 'Why God, why?', which will get me nowhere except depressed or I can choose to put the past disappointments behind me and let it all go. After all, these incidents are all over and the year 2012 has passed. I could never go back to the past and change things. A new year, a new season has dawned. Why not look forward to the wonderful future God has prepared for us? If your three wishes have not yet materialized in that year, don't be discouraged. It simply means that your fullness of time has not come yet. But that does not mean that these wishes will never come to pass in the future, in the coming year.
For example, writing and publishing a book was one of my three wishes in 2011. Even though the manuscript was mostly completed in Sep 2011, doors to publishing my book were not opened yet. I kept asking God to open the doors to publishers then but it did not happen. Had I gotten discouraged and given up on this promise, the book would not have become a reality. And God is faithful. He did not let me wait too long. Just two months into 2012 and He started opening the doors for publishers! It was considered fast...I know some people took years to finish writing their books and getting it published. The lesson I learnt was that even if this wish did not come to pass in 2011, it did not mean it would never happen. Indeed the Lord showed me that 2012 was the right time for this book to be published. My wish to publish a book was fulfilled not in 2011 but in 2012.
Dear beloved, no matter how disappointed you feel or how discouraging your situation may be, God always has a way to turn it around. It may not be according to your timetable but in my case, He also did not let me wait too long. We can face 2013 discouraged, dragging our feet wondering why God did not come through for us or we can decide to rejoice in the Lord for He is good. I found out that joy is a decision. It does not have to depend on my circumstances. As I was feeling a little discouraged at the start of 2013, waiting for the Lord to bring good news or for something good to happen, the Holy Spirit told me I can start rejoicing now...don't need to wait for things to happen.
Earlier I was praying and asking the Lord to somehow drop His joy into my life and to lift up my spirits. I thought joy was so evasive...why I cannot seem to feel happy or enthusiastic about life. Then one day when the Holy Spirit spoke to me, I suddenly woke up! I decide that I shall not wait for things to turn around or for me to start feeling better then to rejoice. I shall make a conscious decision to rejoice in the Lord right now! This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it! I started to sing praises and worship the Lord. Guess what? My spirits lifted and suddenly my perspective towards the new year is full of hopes!
Joy is a spirit and it is contagious. You will find that when you are joyful, you are usually healthy or even if you are sick, you get well faster. Proverbs 17:22 says 'A cheerful heart does good, like medicine. But a broken spirit dries the bones.' When you are joyful and have a expectation of good things, good things are attracted to you. When good things happen to you, you are even happier and this becomes a good cycle. Well, at the end of the day, when your appointed time comes, God will cause your promise to manifest. The question is: do you want to be found happy and joyful or sad and grouchy when that day comes? The decision is yours.
Well, I have a choice. I can continue to wallow in the question 'Why God, why?', which will get me nowhere except depressed or I can choose to put the past disappointments behind me and let it all go. After all, these incidents are all over and the year 2012 has passed. I could never go back to the past and change things. A new year, a new season has dawned. Why not look forward to the wonderful future God has prepared for us? If your three wishes have not yet materialized in that year, don't be discouraged. It simply means that your fullness of time has not come yet. But that does not mean that these wishes will never come to pass in the future, in the coming year.
For example, writing and publishing a book was one of my three wishes in 2011. Even though the manuscript was mostly completed in Sep 2011, doors to publishing my book were not opened yet. I kept asking God to open the doors to publishers then but it did not happen. Had I gotten discouraged and given up on this promise, the book would not have become a reality. And God is faithful. He did not let me wait too long. Just two months into 2012 and He started opening the doors for publishers! It was considered fast...I know some people took years to finish writing their books and getting it published. The lesson I learnt was that even if this wish did not come to pass in 2011, it did not mean it would never happen. Indeed the Lord showed me that 2012 was the right time for this book to be published. My wish to publish a book was fulfilled not in 2011 but in 2012.
Dear beloved, no matter how disappointed you feel or how discouraging your situation may be, God always has a way to turn it around. It may not be according to your timetable but in my case, He also did not let me wait too long. We can face 2013 discouraged, dragging our feet wondering why God did not come through for us or we can decide to rejoice in the Lord for He is good. I found out that joy is a decision. It does not have to depend on my circumstances. As I was feeling a little discouraged at the start of 2013, waiting for the Lord to bring good news or for something good to happen, the Holy Spirit told me I can start rejoicing now...don't need to wait for things to happen.
Earlier I was praying and asking the Lord to somehow drop His joy into my life and to lift up my spirits. I thought joy was so evasive...why I cannot seem to feel happy or enthusiastic about life. Then one day when the Holy Spirit spoke to me, I suddenly woke up! I decide that I shall not wait for things to turn around or for me to start feeling better then to rejoice. I shall make a conscious decision to rejoice in the Lord right now! This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it! I started to sing praises and worship the Lord. Guess what? My spirits lifted and suddenly my perspective towards the new year is full of hopes!
Joy is a spirit and it is contagious. You will find that when you are joyful, you are usually healthy or even if you are sick, you get well faster. Proverbs 17:22 says 'A cheerful heart does good, like medicine. But a broken spirit dries the bones.' When you are joyful and have a expectation of good things, good things are attracted to you. When good things happen to you, you are even happier and this becomes a good cycle. Well, at the end of the day, when your appointed time comes, God will cause your promise to manifest. The question is: do you want to be found happy and joyful or sad and grouchy when that day comes? The decision is yours.
Right place, right time
Have you ever noticed that no matter how you plead with God, when it is not your time yet, the door will not be opened? You may be frustrated because He is not answering your prayers the way you wanted. For years, I have struggled and wrestled with God over the timing issue of my pregnancy. I kept asking Him to let me conceive soon not knowing that my time has not yet come. But He is so merciful. He never once told me that I got to wait a long time more or even reveal the appointed time of my second child. He knew I would not be able to wait that long and my heart would be so in despair. It was only when the fullness of time has come that He revealed the appointed time.
I thank God on hindsight for not opening that door of my pregnancy then because I knew I might be taking a very different path had I been so preoccupied with my kids at that time. Well, God is sovereign and He still has His ways to realign me to His plan, I am sure but that would not be His best for me. I might have to make a detour and take more time to step into my divine destiny. Yet bible tells us to ask God to teach us to number our days because our time is short. I really do not wish to waste any precious moment not being in the perfect will of God.
On hindsight I saw that I have asked an irrelevant question regarding the timing issue. For years God had been trying to tell me it is not a timing issue (though there is an appointed time for my pregnancy) but a greater plan is at stake. Now I see it...it has to do with my divine destiny, His perfect plan for my life. God is timeless, He lives outside of time, so He does not work according to the confines of time. Instead, I learnt that the fulfillment of His plan involves the sequential occurrence of certain events in our lives. The fullness of time refers to how certain things must happen before others can take place. Hence you will find that some visions or desires will come to fullness before others and these will in turn become the building blocks for your next dream or vision.
To God, He doesn't see or regard the time taken for these events to take place. All He sees is that these milestones have to be completed before the appointed time can come. I also realize that location is very important in His plan. Did you notice that right place comes before right time? God created places before He made man. There is a designated place for every of His creature to flourish like fish in the water, birds in the air etc. When you are in the wrong place, there can be no such thing as the right time. Only when God puts you at the right place, then the right time for your manifestation will come. When you are nearing the destination, you will find things moving faster, things falling into place and supernatural doors opening to you. These are doors that could be shut for a long while. Suddenly you find them opening to you effortlessly.
Pastor Mathews commented that crossing over to the Star is like stepping through an open door to a brand new world. For the past three services, our church attendance has increased by 40%! And there was nothing we did to bring about the increase. God was the One who gave us the exponential increase. It was like we had crossed over to another portal, another dimension with the snap of the fingers. No wonder Pastor Prince kept saying he still cannot believe that our church has finally reached the Star after five years. It is truly amazing! Obviously this place is the designated destination that The Lord had in mind for our church. So when we stepped into it, God is able to cause an avalanche of blessings to flow into our lives just like open heavens.
Some of us has experienced how when we 'ran ahead' of His time, getting impatient with His timing, taking things into our hand and rushing things, our dreams are like houses built on shifting sands. When the shaking comes, everything goes. Hence all things, all promises including His people must be allowed to go through the proper process in order to be fully developed and have no handicap. Beloved, take heart that The Lord knows we have waited for a long time but He is also the timeless One living within us. Because He lives in us, He has set us free from the constraints of space and time. If we find ourselves going around in circles, perhaps it would be good to seek The Lord. Are we at the right place? If not, ask Him to move you quickly to the designated location...and once that has happened, you can be confident that the fullness of time is surely not far off!
I thank God on hindsight for not opening that door of my pregnancy then because I knew I might be taking a very different path had I been so preoccupied with my kids at that time. Well, God is sovereign and He still has His ways to realign me to His plan, I am sure but that would not be His best for me. I might have to make a detour and take more time to step into my divine destiny. Yet bible tells us to ask God to teach us to number our days because our time is short. I really do not wish to waste any precious moment not being in the perfect will of God.
On hindsight I saw that I have asked an irrelevant question regarding the timing issue. For years God had been trying to tell me it is not a timing issue (though there is an appointed time for my pregnancy) but a greater plan is at stake. Now I see it...it has to do with my divine destiny, His perfect plan for my life. God is timeless, He lives outside of time, so He does not work according to the confines of time. Instead, I learnt that the fulfillment of His plan involves the sequential occurrence of certain events in our lives. The fullness of time refers to how certain things must happen before others can take place. Hence you will find that some visions or desires will come to fullness before others and these will in turn become the building blocks for your next dream or vision.
To God, He doesn't see or regard the time taken for these events to take place. All He sees is that these milestones have to be completed before the appointed time can come. I also realize that location is very important in His plan. Did you notice that right place comes before right time? God created places before He made man. There is a designated place for every of His creature to flourish like fish in the water, birds in the air etc. When you are in the wrong place, there can be no such thing as the right time. Only when God puts you at the right place, then the right time for your manifestation will come. When you are nearing the destination, you will find things moving faster, things falling into place and supernatural doors opening to you. These are doors that could be shut for a long while. Suddenly you find them opening to you effortlessly.
Pastor Mathews commented that crossing over to the Star is like stepping through an open door to a brand new world. For the past three services, our church attendance has increased by 40%! And there was nothing we did to bring about the increase. God was the One who gave us the exponential increase. It was like we had crossed over to another portal, another dimension with the snap of the fingers. No wonder Pastor Prince kept saying he still cannot believe that our church has finally reached the Star after five years. It is truly amazing! Obviously this place is the designated destination that The Lord had in mind for our church. So when we stepped into it, God is able to cause an avalanche of blessings to flow into our lives just like open heavens.
Some of us has experienced how when we 'ran ahead' of His time, getting impatient with His timing, taking things into our hand and rushing things, our dreams are like houses built on shifting sands. When the shaking comes, everything goes. Hence all things, all promises including His people must be allowed to go through the proper process in order to be fully developed and have no handicap. Beloved, take heart that The Lord knows we have waited for a long time but He is also the timeless One living within us. Because He lives in us, He has set us free from the constraints of space and time. If we find ourselves going around in circles, perhaps it would be good to seek The Lord. Are we at the right place? If not, ask Him to move you quickly to the designated location...and once that has happened, you can be confident that the fullness of time is surely not far off!
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
What about 2013?
We were so excited about the sermon on the first Sunday of the year because Pastor Prince would usually share the theme for the year. He would tell us what the Lord showed him for our local church for the year. He said that the themes of previous years like year of restful increase (2010), year of His crowned goodness (2011) and year of unceasing fruitfulness (2012) still hold true for us. However, there is a special emphasis on His theme for that particular year. Just like the feasts in Israel are appointed by the Lord to remember certain events at specific times of the year, so are the purposes of such themes. It simply means that the theme would feature more prominently throughout that year.
We already experienced how the theme for our church came true for our personal lives in previous years. Pastor said the Lord would usually reveal His word for the local churches, which might be different for different churches. But it would prove to be true for that local church. Pastor Prince revealed that the theme for 2013 is the Year of the Key of David. The Lord showed him Revelation 3:8 'He who has the key of David, He who opens and no one shuts, and shuts and no one opens.' and Isaiah 22:22 'The key of the house of David I will lay on His shoulder; so He shall open, and no one shall shut; and He shall shut, and no one shall open.' This is not a physical key but a key that opens spiritual doors. Jesus is the One who holds that key.
When I heard this, I was dumbfounded because I had come across so many messages about open doors and Revelation 3:7-8 throughout the whole of 2012. It featured so strongly in my devotionals that I could not even record the number of times it appeared. Now I know that the Lord has been preparing me one year in advance, like He did for 2011 when He showed me that I am like a tree planted by the rivers of water and I bear fruit this season. Little did I know that it was the theme for 2012 and one of the anchor verses for that year. I am so excited to hear about this theme because I really loved open doors!
Pastor said that when God opened the door, suddenly we just stepped into a brand new world. It is simply a transfer of location like how we just stepped into the Star. We still cannot believe that we are now worshipping in the Star! But when He does not open that door, it means that the time has not come yet. Or sometimes it is the wrong door and God has shut it for our benefit. There is no use forcing through that door because if He does not open it, no one could open it. But when God opens the door...hallelujah! Everything just moved so fast...especially for those things that were in inertia for a long time. Everything just fell into place effortlessly! It is really a breakthrough!
But of course, with open doors, Pastor also said that there would be adversaries. In 1 Cor 16:9, Apostle Paul said 'A great and effective door has been opened to me but there are many adversaries.' When you are doing God's work, there is bound to be persecutions, resistance, critics, naysayers to oppose you. But Jesus has given us victory over our adversaries and we do not have to be afraid! Pastor prayed for God to deliver us from testings and trials but for those that God allowed, he said the purpose is to strengthen our faith and make us stronger.
Pastor also shared something that I did not expect. In the past two years, he has already been talking about the fertility anointing, fruitfulness in childbearing and that those couples praying for children will receive their miracle babies in that year. So I did not expect the topic on childbearing to come out again in this year's theme. But to my surprise, not only was this area mentioned, it seemed to play a significant role in this year's theme. So much so that Pastor initially wanted to say this is the year of open wombs! Because the Lord told him that this is a year of open wombs and many babies would be born this year. Pastor said that in 2013, those couples who had been trying for years will conceive and give birth this year. Amen! Heng and I received it by faith! We believe the Lord is speaking to us!
The verse Genesis 30:22 'God remembered Rachel and opened her womb' was shared by Pastor. This verse struck a note in my spirit. For years I have been asking the Lord to remember me and open the door to my pregnancy. I knew the womb is likened to a door and God can open or close it. It is a door where His champions enter into this world. I was very happy to receive this word because I can hear the Lord telling me that He remembered me and He is going to open the door of my womb! And when He opens the door, no one can shut it. No one means no demons, no angels, not even myself! Praise Jesus!
It is interesting that even though Pastor has been preaching about fertility and conception in the past two years, it seemed to me that this year, the word about open wombs is the most prominent out of all three themes. It also means that His fertility anointing is the strongest this year. God is so good to me. This desire of having another baby has been one of my three wishes since 2010. Yet at the end of every year, when I hear testimonies of how others received their miracle babies, I somehow felt that I was left out of His blessing in this area. But I thought it cannot be...God will never leave me behind. And so for the past 3 years, I kept holding on to His word that I will conceive and give birth to another baby.
But as the years went by and nothing happened, I was really tempted to give up hoping and believing that what God said would come true for me. I would be so excited at the beginning of each year to hear His word about conceiving and giving birth but at the end of the year when my pregnancy has not yet manifested...I would be a little disappointed. But God never forgot His promise to me all these years. I did not expect childbearing to be featured in this year's theme but it did! God is still saying to me...it's not the end yet! This year He would cause this promise to come to pass and I will surely be carrying my baby in my arms sometime this year! It will be a year of open womb and open doors for me! There will be new life in this family this year! Praise Jesus!
We already experienced how the theme for our church came true for our personal lives in previous years. Pastor said the Lord would usually reveal His word for the local churches, which might be different for different churches. But it would prove to be true for that local church. Pastor Prince revealed that the theme for 2013 is the Year of the Key of David. The Lord showed him Revelation 3:8 'He who has the key of David, He who opens and no one shuts, and shuts and no one opens.' and Isaiah 22:22 'The key of the house of David I will lay on His shoulder; so He shall open, and no one shall shut; and He shall shut, and no one shall open.' This is not a physical key but a key that opens spiritual doors. Jesus is the One who holds that key.
When I heard this, I was dumbfounded because I had come across so many messages about open doors and Revelation 3:7-8 throughout the whole of 2012. It featured so strongly in my devotionals that I could not even record the number of times it appeared. Now I know that the Lord has been preparing me one year in advance, like He did for 2011 when He showed me that I am like a tree planted by the rivers of water and I bear fruit this season. Little did I know that it was the theme for 2012 and one of the anchor verses for that year. I am so excited to hear about this theme because I really loved open doors!
Pastor said that when God opened the door, suddenly we just stepped into a brand new world. It is simply a transfer of location like how we just stepped into the Star. We still cannot believe that we are now worshipping in the Star! But when He does not open that door, it means that the time has not come yet. Or sometimes it is the wrong door and God has shut it for our benefit. There is no use forcing through that door because if He does not open it, no one could open it. But when God opens the door...hallelujah! Everything just moved so fast...especially for those things that were in inertia for a long time. Everything just fell into place effortlessly! It is really a breakthrough!
But of course, with open doors, Pastor also said that there would be adversaries. In 1 Cor 16:9, Apostle Paul said 'A great and effective door has been opened to me but there are many adversaries.' When you are doing God's work, there is bound to be persecutions, resistance, critics, naysayers to oppose you. But Jesus has given us victory over our adversaries and we do not have to be afraid! Pastor prayed for God to deliver us from testings and trials but for those that God allowed, he said the purpose is to strengthen our faith and make us stronger.
Pastor also shared something that I did not expect. In the past two years, he has already been talking about the fertility anointing, fruitfulness in childbearing and that those couples praying for children will receive their miracle babies in that year. So I did not expect the topic on childbearing to come out again in this year's theme. But to my surprise, not only was this area mentioned, it seemed to play a significant role in this year's theme. So much so that Pastor initially wanted to say this is the year of open wombs! Because the Lord told him that this is a year of open wombs and many babies would be born this year. Pastor said that in 2013, those couples who had been trying for years will conceive and give birth this year. Amen! Heng and I received it by faith! We believe the Lord is speaking to us!
The verse Genesis 30:22 'God remembered Rachel and opened her womb' was shared by Pastor. This verse struck a note in my spirit. For years I have been asking the Lord to remember me and open the door to my pregnancy. I knew the womb is likened to a door and God can open or close it. It is a door where His champions enter into this world. I was very happy to receive this word because I can hear the Lord telling me that He remembered me and He is going to open the door of my womb! And when He opens the door, no one can shut it. No one means no demons, no angels, not even myself! Praise Jesus!
It is interesting that even though Pastor has been preaching about fertility and conception in the past two years, it seemed to me that this year, the word about open wombs is the most prominent out of all three themes. It also means that His fertility anointing is the strongest this year. God is so good to me. This desire of having another baby has been one of my three wishes since 2010. Yet at the end of every year, when I hear testimonies of how others received their miracle babies, I somehow felt that I was left out of His blessing in this area. But I thought it cannot be...God will never leave me behind. And so for the past 3 years, I kept holding on to His word that I will conceive and give birth to another baby.
But as the years went by and nothing happened, I was really tempted to give up hoping and believing that what God said would come true for me. I would be so excited at the beginning of each year to hear His word about conceiving and giving birth but at the end of the year when my pregnancy has not yet manifested...I would be a little disappointed. But God never forgot His promise to me all these years. I did not expect childbearing to be featured in this year's theme but it did! God is still saying to me...it's not the end yet! This year He would cause this promise to come to pass and I will surely be carrying my baby in my arms sometime this year! It will be a year of open womb and open doors for me! There will be new life in this family this year! Praise Jesus!
Joshua's first few days in P1
It was an intense three days for us as parents as we accompanied Joshua to his primary school last week. I always wondered why parents liked to make it a big deal when their kids go primary one. Now as I go through this experience, I must confess that it is a big deal. The transition from pre-school to primary school is a big one. Not only do the kids have to stay longer in school, they have to learn to be more independent than before. They have to take care of their belongings, take note of what teachers tell them, buy their food at canteen and make new friends in a big place, unlike their kindergarten.
It is a significant milestone in Joshua's life as he transitions to primary school and I prayed that these few days would be a good memory for him. Once he started on a good note, then the rest of the primary school days would be more like clockwork. As we watched him get on his school bus on the first day of school, we were more anxious than him. Would he cry? Would he miss us? Would he make new friends? How would he feel in a big school with all strangers around him?
I tell you to my shame, though I trusted and believed God to take care of him, it was still very difficult to let go. Afterall, this boy is so precious to me. I could never thank God enough for this baby when he was born. It is so amazing to see him grow each day. I never knew how precious he is to me until recently. I missed him so much when he went to school. I was so concerned about his well-being in school that I worried unnecessarily and fell sick. I want to see him happy and enjoy school. When I saw him happy and adjusting well in school, that makes my heart sing and shout for joy. Even though Joshua is quite shy and reserved, we prayed for him to be bold. God answered our prayers. He asked someone to be his friend on the first day and now he has three new friends. What a marvelous thing the Lord has done for me!
Then the Lord spoke to me...He said 'Just as you have grown so close and attached to Joshua all these while as you stayed home, did you realize that I have grown so close and attached to you too? Your intense feelings for Joshua is only a small fraction compared to what I feel about you. Did you know you have become so much more precious to me? Yes, Joshua is already precious when he was born. But you cannot imagine how much more can that love for him grow right? Yet it did. No matter how intensely in love with him when he was born, your feelings for him far surpassed that in the beginning.'
I was already crying when He continued 'So it is for Me. Yes, when you were first saved, my feelings for you were already intense. But as you took time to spend with Me, listen to Me, sit at My feet, listen to My heartbeat...oh how much more did that love grow! Your well being is also My well being. Seeing you happy and adjusted lights up my face like you can never imagine. But when I see you sad or fearful or cry out your heart, it is like a knife piercing through my heart. My beloved daughter, do you not know that you are like a piece of My heart's flesh walking around outside of Me? Just as nothing can affect you more than Joshua, nothing can affect Me more than you. My eyes are always on you. There can be a million others around you but I only have eyes on you. Just like how all the other children did not matter to you except Joshua right? Your eyes are always on the lookout for him and got fixated on him once you see him.'
The Lord said 'Look at you! You are so blessed, you know. You have My heart, you know My intimate thoughts and you have My mind. You think about the things I think about, you feel strongly about the things I feel about...you respond quickly when I speak to you. Do you know what I would do for someone like that? Everything! I will not hold back anything from you because I trust you. Yes, this time of fellowship with you, I saw how you chose to honor Me...so many times when your heart hurts like crazy. You even chose to think that you are the one who missed it when what you hoped to see did not come to pass. You refuse to say that I did not honor My Word or that My Word is not true. You still wanted to protect My name and My reputation. When you were in doubts, you still never cause one of my sheep to stumble or feel in anyway that I am not a good God. No matter how disappointed you felt, you always say your circumstances do not negate the fact that I am a good God and My word is true. Do you have any idea at all how proud and how pleased I am with you?'
Dear brethren, these things that the Lord shared with me I could share freely with you because I want you to know that is how the Lord looked at you too. No matter how far we have strayed, how many mistakes we have made, the Lord is still loving us, beckoning us to His side. We are so precious in His eyes, we can never imagine on this side of heaven. When we start to see ourselves as how He sees us, this revelation will totally transform your lives. I can testify to it. His love and how He views us makes us champions in life even though we used to be cowards. I really hope that each one of you can discover how you look to God...be surprised, very surprised and what He reveals to you!
It is a significant milestone in Joshua's life as he transitions to primary school and I prayed that these few days would be a good memory for him. Once he started on a good note, then the rest of the primary school days would be more like clockwork. As we watched him get on his school bus on the first day of school, we were more anxious than him. Would he cry? Would he miss us? Would he make new friends? How would he feel in a big school with all strangers around him?
I tell you to my shame, though I trusted and believed God to take care of him, it was still very difficult to let go. Afterall, this boy is so precious to me. I could never thank God enough for this baby when he was born. It is so amazing to see him grow each day. I never knew how precious he is to me until recently. I missed him so much when he went to school. I was so concerned about his well-being in school that I worried unnecessarily and fell sick. I want to see him happy and enjoy school. When I saw him happy and adjusting well in school, that makes my heart sing and shout for joy. Even though Joshua is quite shy and reserved, we prayed for him to be bold. God answered our prayers. He asked someone to be his friend on the first day and now he has three new friends. What a marvelous thing the Lord has done for me!
Then the Lord spoke to me...He said 'Just as you have grown so close and attached to Joshua all these while as you stayed home, did you realize that I have grown so close and attached to you too? Your intense feelings for Joshua is only a small fraction compared to what I feel about you. Did you know you have become so much more precious to me? Yes, Joshua is already precious when he was born. But you cannot imagine how much more can that love for him grow right? Yet it did. No matter how intensely in love with him when he was born, your feelings for him far surpassed that in the beginning.'
I was already crying when He continued 'So it is for Me. Yes, when you were first saved, my feelings for you were already intense. But as you took time to spend with Me, listen to Me, sit at My feet, listen to My heartbeat...oh how much more did that love grow! Your well being is also My well being. Seeing you happy and adjusted lights up my face like you can never imagine. But when I see you sad or fearful or cry out your heart, it is like a knife piercing through my heart. My beloved daughter, do you not know that you are like a piece of My heart's flesh walking around outside of Me? Just as nothing can affect you more than Joshua, nothing can affect Me more than you. My eyes are always on you. There can be a million others around you but I only have eyes on you. Just like how all the other children did not matter to you except Joshua right? Your eyes are always on the lookout for him and got fixated on him once you see him.'
The Lord said 'Look at you! You are so blessed, you know. You have My heart, you know My intimate thoughts and you have My mind. You think about the things I think about, you feel strongly about the things I feel about...you respond quickly when I speak to you. Do you know what I would do for someone like that? Everything! I will not hold back anything from you because I trust you. Yes, this time of fellowship with you, I saw how you chose to honor Me...so many times when your heart hurts like crazy. You even chose to think that you are the one who missed it when what you hoped to see did not come to pass. You refuse to say that I did not honor My Word or that My Word is not true. You still wanted to protect My name and My reputation. When you were in doubts, you still never cause one of my sheep to stumble or feel in anyway that I am not a good God. No matter how disappointed you felt, you always say your circumstances do not negate the fact that I am a good God and My word is true. Do you have any idea at all how proud and how pleased I am with you?'
Dear brethren, these things that the Lord shared with me I could share freely with you because I want you to know that is how the Lord looked at you too. No matter how far we have strayed, how many mistakes we have made, the Lord is still loving us, beckoning us to His side. We are so precious in His eyes, we can never imagine on this side of heaven. When we start to see ourselves as how He sees us, this revelation will totally transform your lives. I can testify to it. His love and how He views us makes us champions in life even though we used to be cowards. I really hope that each one of you can discover how you look to God...be surprised, very surprised and what He reveals to you!
My Journey for the last 5 years
Near the end of 2012, I have been asking the Lord to show me what would 2013 be like. I wanted to hear from the Lord before Pastor Prince preached about the year's theme on 6 Jan 2013. But instead of showing me the things to come, the Lord took me on a review of the things He has done for the last five years of my life. It was a lengthy review because of the many shifts and moves He had accomplished over that period of my life. It was perhaps the most eventful five-year period of my life ever.
I was reminded of what I asked the Lord in Jan 2008. At that time I was looking forward to a season of staying home to take care of Joshua. But I was not sure if that was God's will or His timing for me to do so. Hence I sought the Lord about His will for me in that season of my life. The Lord told me 'Can I not show you? I want you to trust me.' He gave me Psalm 46:10 'Be still and know that I am Lord.' Many times when we pray 'Lord, show me Your will', we are often asking for truths that are not pertinent until years from now. Then we sometimes got frustrated because God is not showing us the full picture.
The Lord is asking me to trust Him until the time for His plan is ripe. At that time, God's timing has not coincided with mine. I was eager to start my new season of staying home but it was not my time to do so yet. He told me that He would speak when everything is in place for Him to reveal the next steps in my life. Little did I imagine then that He was taking me on the journey of my life. So many things happened in the last 5 years - so many divine shifts and physical moves. Yet through it all, the Lord never really told me my final destination in that season or when all these things would come to fruition. I just knew I had to obey Him when He told me to break camp and move on. But if He did not say move on, I would just stay put no matter how tough the situation was.
My experience taught me that in the unfolding of our destinies, the Lord would always tell us to come out of something or some place, to let go of the past and move towards the new thing He has prepared for us. For me, it was coming out of my old church, coming out of my old workplace, coming out of our old home, coming out of Joshua's old school and coming out of our church's old worship venues. It was definitely not easy for I am a very nostalgic and sentimental person. But as the Lord led me to separate myself from the world, it was a progressive change. He started with the renewing of my mind with His word. He was merciful. He knew I could not take it if He moved me straight from Pt A to Pt Z. I might feel it was a long, windy road up the steep mountain but in actual fact, it was a less strenous and exhausting route, compared to a straight path up the mountain. He had to take me on a path that He was confident of me finishing the journey and not dropping out halfway.
And through each physical move, I felt that a part of the 'old me' died with the move. I don't know how to explain this. Though we are a new creation in Christ at the point of conversion, a lot of the 'old man' still remained in us. Our spirit is renewed but not our mind, our soul and our body. God had to slowly renew our minds in order for us to be used mightily by Him. So whenever God wanted to move me closer to my divine destiny, He would reposition me and mark it with a physical move. This is to signify the clear change in season. He would also tell me to let go of my baggages and move on. He did this a couple of times until one day I realised that all traces connected to my past were physically removed. Granted, past memories might still remain in my head but slowly these memories are getting very faint.
As I looked at my life now, I realised I am really in a new phase of my life. Old church, old home, old workplace, Joshua's old school and now even our church's old worship venues are no longer in my life! I remember the Lord telling me that when I reached the destination for this season and when the fullness of time has come, I will know it. After our church crossed over to the Star, He started showing me His plan for the last five years, things He could not share with me then. The time was not right and I was not ready to accept His plan for me...if He told me that I would not give birth until some five years later, I would have given up then. I was so keen to have my second baby at that time.
But now, the Lord has told me plainly what was happening in the last season of my life and with the move to The Star, the entire process is now complete. He who started a good work in me five years ago has brought it to completion. Indeed the desires and dreams I had over the past five years have all come to pass except my pregnancy. But He assured me that this desire is manifesting now because the fullness of time has come. He told me that the old season has passed and a new season has dawned. He said that now I am finally ready for His assignments and He would reveal the next steps in my life. In the days and months to come, He will reveal new dreams and desires that would mark my new season. God is so good and His faithfulness was what I could hang on to all these years.
Though it was sometimes difficult and confusing when you are in the process of being refined, now that the process is over and you look back, you are surprised to see a totally new you! And the Lord has indeed brought you so much further than where you were five years ago. I thank God for He has finally positioned me where He wanted me and I have stepped into my divine destiny. I have come to His divine appointment, a place where He commands all the blessings to pour out into my life! My best years are yet to come! Praise Jesus!
I was reminded of what I asked the Lord in Jan 2008. At that time I was looking forward to a season of staying home to take care of Joshua. But I was not sure if that was God's will or His timing for me to do so. Hence I sought the Lord about His will for me in that season of my life. The Lord told me 'Can I not show you? I want you to trust me.' He gave me Psalm 46:10 'Be still and know that I am Lord.' Many times when we pray 'Lord, show me Your will', we are often asking for truths that are not pertinent until years from now. Then we sometimes got frustrated because God is not showing us the full picture.
The Lord is asking me to trust Him until the time for His plan is ripe. At that time, God's timing has not coincided with mine. I was eager to start my new season of staying home but it was not my time to do so yet. He told me that He would speak when everything is in place for Him to reveal the next steps in my life. Little did I imagine then that He was taking me on the journey of my life. So many things happened in the last 5 years - so many divine shifts and physical moves. Yet through it all, the Lord never really told me my final destination in that season or when all these things would come to fruition. I just knew I had to obey Him when He told me to break camp and move on. But if He did not say move on, I would just stay put no matter how tough the situation was.
My experience taught me that in the unfolding of our destinies, the Lord would always tell us to come out of something or some place, to let go of the past and move towards the new thing He has prepared for us. For me, it was coming out of my old church, coming out of my old workplace, coming out of our old home, coming out of Joshua's old school and coming out of our church's old worship venues. It was definitely not easy for I am a very nostalgic and sentimental person. But as the Lord led me to separate myself from the world, it was a progressive change. He started with the renewing of my mind with His word. He was merciful. He knew I could not take it if He moved me straight from Pt A to Pt Z. I might feel it was a long, windy road up the steep mountain but in actual fact, it was a less strenous and exhausting route, compared to a straight path up the mountain. He had to take me on a path that He was confident of me finishing the journey and not dropping out halfway.
And through each physical move, I felt that a part of the 'old me' died with the move. I don't know how to explain this. Though we are a new creation in Christ at the point of conversion, a lot of the 'old man' still remained in us. Our spirit is renewed but not our mind, our soul and our body. God had to slowly renew our minds in order for us to be used mightily by Him. So whenever God wanted to move me closer to my divine destiny, He would reposition me and mark it with a physical move. This is to signify the clear change in season. He would also tell me to let go of my baggages and move on. He did this a couple of times until one day I realised that all traces connected to my past were physically removed. Granted, past memories might still remain in my head but slowly these memories are getting very faint.
As I looked at my life now, I realised I am really in a new phase of my life. Old church, old home, old workplace, Joshua's old school and now even our church's old worship venues are no longer in my life! I remember the Lord telling me that when I reached the destination for this season and when the fullness of time has come, I will know it. After our church crossed over to the Star, He started showing me His plan for the last five years, things He could not share with me then. The time was not right and I was not ready to accept His plan for me...if He told me that I would not give birth until some five years later, I would have given up then. I was so keen to have my second baby at that time.
But now, the Lord has told me plainly what was happening in the last season of my life and with the move to The Star, the entire process is now complete. He who started a good work in me five years ago has brought it to completion. Indeed the desires and dreams I had over the past five years have all come to pass except my pregnancy. But He assured me that this desire is manifesting now because the fullness of time has come. He told me that the old season has passed and a new season has dawned. He said that now I am finally ready for His assignments and He would reveal the next steps in my life. In the days and months to come, He will reveal new dreams and desires that would mark my new season. God is so good and His faithfulness was what I could hang on to all these years.
Though it was sometimes difficult and confusing when you are in the process of being refined, now that the process is over and you look back, you are surprised to see a totally new you! And the Lord has indeed brought you so much further than where you were five years ago. I thank God for He has finally positioned me where He wanted me and I have stepped into my divine destiny. I have come to His divine appointment, a place where He commands all the blessings to pour out into my life! My best years are yet to come! Praise Jesus!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)