I used to think that I cannot always follow my desires, what I want or don't want to do. Because that will cause me to be irresponsible and unstable. Like what if you wake up the next morning and suddenly you don't want to be married to your hubby? I used to hear people quoting the bible saying that you cannot trust your heart because it is deceitful above all things. I think the author of Proverbs was referring to the person who is not saved, hence he cannot trust his heart. For believers who have the Holy Spirit living within us, if we are sensitive to Him, we will find that He is always leading us through our desires. Philippians 2:13 says that it is God who works in you both to will and to do according to His good pleasures.
Just like how people say grace will give others a license to sin. Yet the matter of the fact is people are still sinning under the law, perhaps even more because the strength of the law is sin. I always thought I got to force myself to do the things I don't like for the greater good of others, for the kingdom of God. That way I will build tenacity of character. But as I learnt more about His grace and the gift of righteousness, I realized that I was putting myself under the law, under demands when I do that. I know because whenever I forced myself to do something I don't like, to live up to others' expectation, a part of me dies. It's that part of me which God made me to be. When I keep forcing myself to do that long enough, I find that I don't even know I really am. I forgot to be true to myself, to who He made me to be.
In my walk with The Lord, I find that He never once forced me to do something I had no desire for. He will always work a desire in me before He shows me this is His will. And He always gives me a choice, whether I want to do it or not. If I choose not to do it, He will not condemn me for my choice. He will still assure me He loves me because His love is not based on my performance. Oh, that is so liberating to me! It's a life of grace. I have learnt to flow in His Spirit by recognizing the desires He puts in my heart. And when other people give me advice that doesn't bear witness to my spirit, I can be secure in what God told me. I will have a boldness that says 'Thanks for your advice but that is not for me.'
Oh then what about those times when you really don't feel like doing something yet you know The Lord would like you to do it? Do you follow your desire and defy God? When those times come and they do, The Lord will wait and patiently work in me to create the desire to do so. And He will tell me that if I do it, there will be a supernatural grace. He will supply the anointing for me to go through the thing I dread. Most of the times, after I have done it, I will realize that it was God causing me to overcome an area which I failed repeatedly. The mystery of grace is that it always causes you to overcome. The law will never give you the power to overcome.
I find that many people make Him out to be such a hard God. They will tell you that God left you in the fiery furnace to suffer so that your faith can be refined as gold. If you choose to opt out, then it shows that you are of a weak mettle. You have not fought the good fight of faith. Yes, I agree that God sometimes puts us through certain tests to let us grow but He knows our limits. He knows how much we can bear. His primary interest is our well-being, more than just the test at hand. He won't let us crumble. What people forget to tell you is that Christ is there with you in the fiery furnace. He is not a distant God. He is there with you in your darkest moments, turning your situation around.
After a while, I learnt not to put myself under the law, forcing myself to do things I don't want to. I learnt to go by the law of the Spirit, which means that I go by the life I feel on the inside of me. Well, you will ask: going by the life or lack of, is that even reliable? Surely! Much more reliable than going by the law. The law will only keep you in 'check' outwardly. But when anarchy rules, you will see the true nature of humans. Grace, on the other hand, will cause a heart transformation, which is far more lasting than outward behavioral changes. When I walk by the life of the Spirit, my desires will never lead me to do something to displease God or dishonor Him.
And even when I feel rebellious at times, like I really don't want to do the thing which I know is what God desires, there would be a struggle within me. There would be such an unrest in my spirit because eventually I don't want to make God upset. I will think about how good God is to me, how He never forces me to do things (unlike the world) and how He never makes me feel condemned. My heart would soften at that thought. After a while I would come back to the place of peace when I decide to align my will to His will.
That's the power of grace, my friend. The goodness of God will always lead one to repentance, which is the changing of our minds. That's the power of His love. He has given us free choice and He respects our decision. Yes I can exercise my free will to go against Him but why would I do that when I know that He loves me so much and everything He does is for my good? The law is cold and hard, given to the Israelites in tablets of stones but Jesus came personally to give us grace. It's easy to sin against two cold, hard pieces of stones but to sin against Jesus, the One who loves us so much, gave His life for us on the cross for the forgiveness of our sins. How can one even bring himself to do that to Jesus? Oh the limitless love of God!
No comments:
Post a Comment